"You help me, I help you".....today was one of those memorable days. One of those days that are imprinted in your memory for a long while. One of those days that only need a key word to be mentioned to bring a laugh and shaking of the head. 

It began with jet lag. I watched The Return of the King (extended version...and yes I did bring it - you don't know when you'll be in need of diversion; and yes, I did fast forward the gory parts) late into the night; close to 3am to be exact. Then I sent emails, turned off the air conditioning because it was too cold and I couldn't figure out how to just turn the air down till close to 4. 

We decided to take a cab to the Grand Palace. We got the security receptionist at the entrance to our building (yes! we have receptionists sitting in the entrance of our building, and a uniformed GUARD standing in the parking area) ! 

We got the receptionist to write down our address in Thai so we could make our way home again, and off we went.  

The Thai people really seem to revere their king - everywhere you drive there are huge billboards with his picture on them. Either that, or he just likes to see his picture up in lights!

We got near the Grand Palace, and began to see gold plated temples and buildings everywhere. Incredible architecture. The Taxi driver dropped us off, and before we could even move, a guy moved in on us, telling us in very basic English that the Palace was closed for a ceremony for 1 hour, but that this other man would take us to the Standing Buddha in his vehicle which is composed of a cab and back seat with roof on a tricycle frame. We tried to tell him we just wanted to walk around, but there was no deferring him. He and the other driver insisted, and waved their fingers at us "just 20 baht! you, you, you - 20 baht each". "I drive, wait while you look".

So off we went! We hardly knew what hit us. The ride was exhilarating. Tearing through Bangkok traffic driving on the left side of the road, with motorcycle taxis weaving in out, nearly hitting buses, pedestrians taking their lives in their hands as they try to cross the streets in the middle of all this. Vendors lining the streets with their wares, black electric wire hanging in large bunches exposed to the elements. Rosie, your food safety course would be utterly irrelevant here. Vendors cook their meat on small grills right in the heat, wonderful smells of meat roasting, fruit vendors cutting watermelon and pineapple, mangoes and melons with experienced expertise fill the air.

Back to our story. After wandering around the massive structure of the standing Buddha and all the Buddhist worship paraphernalia, we were ready to return; but our laughing, friendly host had no intentions of letting us off this easy. "You help me, I help you" was what we heard numerous times in the next hour. We had no idea what he meant, but his laughter and smiles lulled us into compliance. He drove us to a large Bangkok gemstone sales centre. By gemstones, I mean rings that cost 450,000 baht, or 13,000 Canadian dollars - and that was with the generous discount they were going to give us (today only)!

Next, he drove us to the Chinese gemstone shop; and then the expensive tailors. "No buy, look; only look". No kidding. There was no reasoning with him. We tried to tell him we didn't WANT to go to these stores, but off we went! Next, an expensive gift shop; it turns out he gets free gas stamps for bringing in potential customers, and, I suspect, a commission. We told him in no uncertain terms we had enough, but he insisted "just one more, then no more"! Well, we went to one more tailor. By this time, his charm and laughter had turned to a very unhappy driver, who weaved in and out of traffic with serious attitude. Gwen was seriously ticked, and I was laughing. We got back to the Grand Palace to find out that Rob was required to borrow a pair of long pants from the Buddhist information centre since he was not allowed to wear shorts on the tour. He got his pants after a long wait in line and a 200 baht deposit, and off we went; the entrance fee turned out to be 15.00 Canadian dollars each, which we were too tired to be willing to dish out, so we walked the grounds and picked up a taxi home.

Great day, great vendor exposure, great pictures, great memories.